seifukucat:

sir could you just calm down for a second

seifukucat:

sir could you just calm down for a second

(Source: appil)


reallylameblog:

do NOT let anyone tell u that america is free, i tried to buy it once and it is in fact very very expensive


slutwhat:

i laughed way too much

slutwhat:

i laughed way too much

(Source: stuckinbowserscastle)


hamburgurl:

I’m like 25% funny and 85% bad at math


In the delivery room

tokomon:

mother: is it a boy or a girl?

doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor


chief-keefs-lotion:

dewitts:

sodomywithsaddam:

okayyy can everybody stop talking shit about ppl who give their dogs and cats all-vegan diets, i fed my cat all raw vegan food since he was a kitten and he lived a very happy four years :)

image

this bitch murdered her own cat


laina:

gmornin

laina:

gmornin


punishedsnakes:

when ur friend makes great art

image

(Source: sweetkojuro)


I think I feel too much
Six Word Story - c.b (deadly—sins)

(Source: deadly--sins)


twotibsawhisker:

'hey, we're bees' is probably the calmest reaction ever to this situation

If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

(Source: fuckyeah1990s)


meladoodle:

There was a bee on my bus just trying to get out the window to the flowers. But the window was solid.. The bee couldn’t fly through the window but it could see the flowers

If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.


64px:

sweet dreams are made of bees, who am i to diss a bee, travel the world with the seven bees, everybodys looking for……….bees

If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.


What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction.
Chuck Palahniuk, Choke (via endangerment)

(Source: larmoyante)


worst day worst week I am having such a bad month I’m so unhappy


I just want someone who won’t get annoyed when I text them six times or in all caps. Someone I can go on long drives with and can sing along to the radio with. Someone I can eat pizza with at 2am and kiss at 6pm. Someone who chooses me everyday and never thinks twice about it.
(via jessielou24)